This is the most an extensive guide to expertise what her ex states vs. What they really mean.

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In this new guide we are going to be taking some of the most common things an ex will certainly say during or after ~ a breakup and also dissecting them because that you so the you can understand precisely what lock mean.

Let’s dive appropriate in.


Coming from a guy that more than likely said,

“You’re the best thing that ever before happened come me”


“I’m therefore glad ns met you”

Throughout your relationship.

It most likely threw girlfriend off totally hearing the say ns wish I never met you.

So, lets take a moment and dissect what’s yes, really going top top in his head.

What the Really way When He states I wish I never ever Met You

The fact is the it might mean several various things. The first thing that involves mind is one of my favorite quotes from good Will Hunting.

“Most days i wish I never met you since then I might sleep in ~ night and also I wouldn’t need to walk about with the knowledge there was someone like you out there.”

Something tells me her ex didn’t say it in this way, otherwise you more than likely wouldn’t be on this site.

But the irradiate at the finish of the tunnel is that what he yes, really meant as soon as he states he wishes he never met friend is that he is very hurt by you. You’ve lugged out such strong feelings the he cannot transaction with. It’s actually not the worst thing as soon as a male reacts emotionally choose this due to the fact that it way that he has feelings in the direction of you. Even if they are negative feelings, that still has actually passion once it involves you.

If he was nonchalant and aloof climate you should worry a tiny more.

Oftentimes men don’t know how to refer themselves and women do and also so they will to the easiest thing that pertains to mind.

It’s nice childish really.

They say things they don’t mean and also a the majority of times they end up regretting it. It never feels good to fight. In the minute it relieves part stress however later human being often feel bad around it.

I’d be ready to bet her ex will regret or at least feel bad about things he states to girlfriend in the warm of the moment at part point.

Even when he claims things choose “I wish I never ever met you.”

He Purposefully avoids You

What walk this look at like?

Well, normally after a breakup there space a many of complicated emotions.

Men and also women reaction in every kinds of ways to this emotions. Some choose to start arguments. Others prefer to operation away.

With this certain action friend are frequently dealing with an ex that is trying come avoid communication with you.

This can come in many forms.

They don’t respond come your message messagesThey check out you in the hallway and turn the various other wayThey avoid frequenting areas that the two of you can intersect.

The question you room coming to me come answer is why?

What walk It average If one Ex avoids You?

I’ve to be on document saying that the the contrary of love isn’t hate, it’s indifference.

So, I’m no going to sit here and also lie come you and say the your ex preventing you is a an excellent thing it’s not.

What we have to look at though is if they room ghosting girlfriend or staying clear of you.

Someone that ghosts you normally does that with the will of never ever talking to you again (most realize your mistake or rest this intent at part point.)

But I will say that if you have an ex that is staying clear of you meaning they recognize you in these tiny ways yet won’t engage with you straight it’s generally an indication the they are terrified that a confrontation.

We view this a many in avoidant exes.

They view themselves together independent and also not needing any outside drama to affect their lives but at the very same time lock crave closeness.

It’s a bit of a paradox yet let’s continue walking this chop rope.

An avoidant ex will look at interactions with you together unnecessary drama and so castle will prevent them.

The vital thing come remember right here is the it’s not anything girlfriend did wrong.

This is an ext about the narrative the is in her exes head.

So, it’s precise no use hyper examining the past and beating yourself up end it.

Avoidant exes usually execute come around.

He Hugs You

This one is walking to it is in naturally shorter because ns don’t really have actually a lot come say around it.

Your ex hugs you.

This can be after a breakup.

This deserve to be throughout a breakup.

They usually hug you.

Does it mean anything?

Does an Ex Hugging You typical Anything?

The answer to this is that “it depends.”

When the hug happensHow meaningful the hug is

These space the two determinants you space going to desire to pay attention to.

Generally speaking if a hug happens at the beginning of a date then it’s not that meaningful.

If a hug wake up at a breakup climate it’s not that big of a deal.

If the hug happens after a day that has gone yes, really well, it means something.

But exactly how do you identify a systematic hug matches a non meaningful one.

My walk to has always been length of time hugged and also gut feeling.

If your ex conveniently hugs you at the beginning of a day that’s essentially the exact same thing together them speak hello.

But if it happens at the end of the date and also the hug lasts because that a lengthy time.

Then it method something.

It’s not rocket science.

You need To move On

This one is pretty self explanatory too.

Your ex breaks up with you and also at some suggest you either beg for them back or execute something that provides them think you want them back.

To which lock respond,

“You know… you should really move on.”

It’s actually not uncommon.

We’ve checked out this occur a lot.

So, what does your ex mean?

What her Ex means When castle Tell girlfriend To move On

One that the very first success story that I ever interviewed to be a mrs by the surname of buy it Michelle,

At the very beginning that the interview Sarah says something interesting.

Her ex literally called her,

I don’t care about youI don’t love youYOU require TO move ON

And after going through our program (because it’s awesome) she pertained to find out that the didn’t really mean any kind of of it.

This is a bit complex to explain but if her ex is telling you to move on then they do typical it in the moment.

The crucial thing come wrap your head around is the “in the moment” part.

When her ex is telling you the they want you to move on they do want girlfriend to relocate on.

However, those feelings room subject to change and it’s not collection in stone.

We also know from researching avoidants the they will often tend to press you away when dealing with complex emotions (like a breakup) and you simply need to provide them an are which is definitely complicated to do.

I still Care around You

Again, a very easy one to understand.

At some suggest after the breakup her ex claims to you,

“Look ns still care around you deeply.”

The real an obstacle with this expression isn’t in identifying it but rather knowledge it.

What Does her Ex average When lock Say that They tho Care around You?

I guess: v to additional dive right into that line of reasoning we need to recognize the context in i m sorry it to be said.

Having one ex say,

“I care around you a lot yet I’m just not interested in date you appropriate now”

Is a lot various than them simply saying,

“I care around you.”

So, here’s the general dominance of thumb I prefer to tell my clients. If an ex is speak “but” in ~ the finish of the this statement it’s commonly not authentic.

If lock aren’t speak “but” at the finish of the statement then the possibilities are greater that your ex is being authentic.

The Breakup Is your Fault

We run across this a lot and also I will say that expertise this one is actually a lot simpler than identify it.


Well, often times your ex have the right to “blame” you because that the breakup without actually blaming you.

In other words lock think it together opposed come verbalizing it.

Pay fist to your body language as soon as you talk to them. If you capture them rolling your eyes or scoffing once you say something it’s no a stretch come think that they blame you for the breakup.

Even if they damaged up with you and also caused the breakup.

What her Ex way When her Ex states The Breakup Is your Fault

This is an interesting one come psychoanalyze since often times her ex becomes irrational around blaming you for the breakup.

Coach Anna and I walk this really an excellent interview wherein we talked around anger and exes,

We basically concluded that a the majority of times one ex grows upset at friend irrationally since it’s easier to job their anger onto who or something as opposed to themselves.

This is a perfect explanation the the “blame game” her ex is playing here.

I’ve rarely encountered a situation where one human being is totally to blame because that a breakup.

So, what’s most likely happening is the your ex is blaming you so lock don’t feeling guilty about taking duty for the mistakes they made.

It’s a lot easier to say,

“You make me flirt with other people because you weren’t offering me what I necessary in a relationship”

As protest to the truth,

“I was also afraid come tell friend what I necessary to do the partnership work.”

And for this reason they reprimand you since it’s the easiest thing to do.

Let’s fulfill Up and also Talk

This one is a funny one.

Usually it wake up in two distinctive moments.

Immediately after ~ a no call rule whereby you have ignored them.When things are going really great in the rapport structure phase

At some suggest your ex just decides to blurt out,

“Hey us should accomplish up and also talk.”

Other sport of this encompass exes saying,

“Hey let’s seize a cup the coffee part time.”

So, perform they mean it?

What Does your Ex typical When They say Let’s accomplish Up and also Talk

Most of the moment your ex is gift authentic as soon as they questioning to check out you.

However, there room two points I’d favor to talk to you about with this.

The first is the you shouldn’t game the idea of conference up specifically when they desire to. In other words, it’s almost always much better to expropriate but readjust the date.


Well, since of the second thing I’m walk to speak to you around today.

We have actually noticed an great trend where exes provide mixed signals. In other words, lock are having this vast internal fight in their head and in the minute they feel choose they want to see you yet later regret it.

By expanded the day you acquire to sniff out if this is happening.

My Ex Is Being extremely Nice come Me

I chose to encompass this one because a many our clients have actually a tough time understanding why your ex is being so nice to them after ~ a breakup.

Usually this form of actions will include,

Saying nice thingsAsking you the end to funny placesYou acquire it.

So, what’s walking on here?

What her Ex Is Doing when They room Being very Nice come You?

Staying v our typical trend here what you’re searching for is context.

In what paper definition is your ex being nice come you?

Are they being nice come you since they want something?

I’m going to allude you earlier to the Carl Jung line,

“If friend can’t figure out what someone is law then merely look in ~ the outcome.

Actions room louder than words.

My main problem is that we’ve seen friends v benefits cases arise and those space always difficult to climb your means out of.

It’s a tiny like opened pandoras box.

A many men and also women think friends through benefits are sort of obvious. That your ex will blatantly do their intentions known.

That’s not what happens at all. It’s commonly messy and confusing and also hard to discover that line.

So, if you want to discover out if her ex is gift authentically nice come you since they care around you then simply take Carl Jung advice.

Look in ~ the outcome.

Which will certainly admittedly take time however you have time.

They broke Up v You without An Explanation

This one I think about to be the closure question.

Your ex broke up v you the end of the blue without an explanation. You space left shell shocked and also you don’t know how to react.

After the smoke gets rid of you are left wanting an explanation or in ~ the very least closure.

Why her Ex damaged Up v You there is no An Explanation

Instead of continuing to be true come our format here in this overview I thought I’d adjust things increase a bit because this yes, really isn’t a timeless says vs means.

This is much more like knowledge the lack of closure that adheres to you around wherever friend go.

So, why did her ex rest up with you and not give you one explanation.

There are really two aspects at job-related here.

They don’t want to hurt your feelingsSelf preservation.

The fact is that they don’t think you have the right to handle the true factor they damaged up through you therefore they either make a fake one up or one that doesn’t do a most sense.

The me preservation component comes into play because if we’re honest your ex not informing you the real reason they broke up through you is therefore they still are looked in ~ favorably by you.

I desire To Be single And have actually Fun

This one is sort of rare in my opinion.

Usually it happens throughout a weak or vindictive moment where they get overly angry and also it slips out.

Or choose I said, they desire to be very vindictive.

Most of the time your ex won’t blatantly say “I desire to be solitary and have fun there is no you.”

Instead they’ll say,

“I want to move on…”

“I can uncover someone far better than you.”

Not really nice, right?

So, does her ex typical it?

What your Ex means When They say They want To Be solitary Have Fun

Remember a couple of phrases earlier when I stated that one ex have the right to authentically mean something but readjust their mental later.

That’s kind of what happens here.

Having her ex say they desire to move on to someone else is a classic grass is greener syndrome.

And the thing around GIGS is that sometimes it works out and also sometimes that doesn’t.

That’s pretty lot this one in a nutshell.

I desire To Get back Together

This one is probably the easiest one.

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If her ex is telling you the they want to get back together they median it…

And depending on your goals (especially if girlfriend bought our program to get your ex back) you have to take them back.